Human beings are hard wired to seek pleasure and avoid pain, so everything you do, every behaviour pattern you’ve ever acquired, is based on that underlying premise.
When you think about everything you’d like to change about yourself, your thoughts, your behaviours, your body, remember you are the way you are because of the ways you found to avoid feeling rubbish and feel happy.
The only trouble is, as we get older, we start to compare ourselves to each other or to expectations of what we should be, which is usually an impression generated by our parents, family, social world and the media. When we don’t measure up, our self-esteem suffers and we can start to feel stress.
Self-esteem is a fragile basis for happiness. You can think of it as being akin to Darwin’s idea of survival of the fittest, in that we subconsciously rank ourselves as if in competition with those around us or compare ourselves to our idea of perfection. You might win for a while, but sooner or later you are going to lose, as there will be someone with more money, someone better looking, someone more talented, or more spiritual than you, or, you’ll fail to get that great job, wonderful partner, or finish writing that book, and your self-esteem will take a dip.
Even when you do get the dream job, promotion, or good exam results the mind has a way of getting used to it, and recalibrates to a higher level, driving you on to the next goal, a faster car, a younger model…meaning – you are never satisfied.
You’ll experience less stress and feel more content when you find a perspective on life that is not based on winning/losing, or perfection, but happiness and satisfaction regardless of the pecking order, what other people might think, or some version of the perfect you.
So, it is time to drop the behaviours and feelings that don’t work for our greatest good and start feeling good for no good reason.
Come to one of our workshop events such as Tapping Into Your Best Self, join the Meditation Room, try a guided meditation or book a coaching programme now. Call 07989 404112 or email firstname.lastname@example.org and start tuning into happiness.